Cute Connorisms

Connor is more and more chatty these days and ever more able to voice his interesting thoughts and questions. Lately, for instance he has been asking a lot about being a grown-up. Now Jamie frequently, rather poignantly, says that he doesn't ever want to be a grown-up and if he is wants to go back to being a kid. Fine with us. But Connor has been asking lately when he will be a grown-up. Jamie tells him he has to be a teenager and then a young adult first, and then we say 16 years. Then, in the car yesterday Connor announced, "I want to be a grown-up NOW!!" Sarah asked him why and he said in his little 3-year-old voice: "Because I want to drink beer!"

Another, rather more sweet one, came at a playground yesterday. He had a great time, but it was also a little fraught. He is at the stage where he can do more things, climb things, get higher move faster, and of course he wants to so he can keep up with Jamie, but he is also not sure of himself yet and so has periodic bursts of anxiety. As a result he wanted to go in the harness swing where he felt safer. As I swung him higher and higher he laughed with delight and said, in that same 3-year-old voice, "Daddy! I feel like a snowflake!"

Here comes Santa Claus

Christmas Eve seemed an eternity to poor Jamie. He had been waiting, not particularly patiently, for Christmas ever since his birthday and time seemed to crawl for him. At about 1 in the afternoon he declared he wanted to go to sleep so he could wake up and it would be Christmas. Sensing a rare opportunity, we pounced and suggested he take a nap to make the time go faster, but this was brushed aside. In fact he spend most of the time watching the NORAD Santa Tracker. It is good to see Pentagon technology being put to some useful end, and in addition to adding to the excitement it produced a day-long geography lesson. We had some friends over later in the and were showing them and they pointed to an island far north of Norway and asked what it was. Jamie immediately answered "Svalbard! And Santa has already been there."

The friends stayed fairly late so the boys didn't get to bed until 9:30 or so. Jamie was torn at this point. He admitted the next day that he had snuck out of bed to look at the Santa Tracker a couple of times. But he also came out at some point genuinely worried because he couldn't fall asleep and he was afraid if Santa got there and he was still up, Santa might pass him by. We reassured him and miracle of miracles he didn't wake up until a little after 7, so Christmas Day didn't start too early for Mommy and Daddy. We also got to bed earlier than the last few Christmas Eves. This was in part due to Sarah excellent organization of the big show, but also because this year there was actually very little pre-assembly to be done.

Bad dream!

Connor woke up this morning absolutely sobbing. He was quite incapable of speech at first so Sarah hugged and kissed him and eventually he calmed down a little. She asked him if he had had a bad dream and he nodded vigorously, still blubbering, and spat out "Cookie!!!" Did you have a bad dream about a cookie, she asked. He nodded and she asked what happened. And then with a new round of tears, "I lost my COOKIE!!!!"

The Boot

Well, our little Jamie has a broken bone in his foot. For the most part it sounds worse than it is. We don't know how exactly it happened, but a couple of weeks ago he began limping and it seemed to really bother him so we took him to the pediatrician, who suspected a slight fracture but wasn't sure and so referred us to an orthopaedist. This was, of course, after seeing us at 11:10 for a 10:00 appt. We had been waiting in the room for about 45 minutes and the boys were being really good. Finally poor Connor, who has really gotten the hang of things with the potty by the way, tells me he needs to go. At which point the doctor arrives and is annoyed that we have to leave.

So off we go to the orthopaedist, whose office is on the 26th floor of the medical tower. The boys like this. We get up there and Connor goes shooting off to the windows. I start filling out paper work and he is there with his wee arms resting on the sill, engaged in vigorous conversation with a woman sitting next to him. They are pointing out the window, finding things, comparing notes. Very cute. We finally get settled and I get the boys some water, before I realize that we forgot the X-rays, the all-important X-rays, in the car, which was valet parked. So back out we head to get them, then all the way back up. About 40 minutes after the appt. time we are called back into the room, where we spend another hour or so. We actually had a great time, playing the exciting "The person who is [blank] is a goose" game. Jamie made this up and it's simple. Describe something about the other person, perhaps their location, appearance or some other detail and say that person is a goose, e.g.: "The person with glasses on is a goose." If you are the target of this, your goal is to change the detail in question if possible. Good times, as Connor would say.

Finally the doc came, looked at the all-important x-rays, confirmed the diagnosis and recommended putting Jamie in a protective boot. This was primarily, he said, to slow him down and keep him from re-injuring it. At the first mention of this, Jamie crawled under a chair and refused to come out. As the technician came to fit the boot Jamie began an absolute knock-down, go to the mattresses fit. Didn't want the boot. Screamed his head off. First I had to drag him out from under the chair as he held on to the legs for dear life. Then it took three of us to hold him down while the boot went on. The screaming continued out into the hallway, past the nurses' station, where, happily, the doctor was sitting. At this point, most activity in the entire office had ceased to watch Jamie throw down. The doc was sympathetic and asked if this was likely to continue. Knowing Jamie's tenaciousness I said indeed it was. To the relief of everyone within a half-mile radius, we then got the OK to take it off, but with instructions to try and keep him from doing too much on it.

Now, this is about like trying to keep the Pope from being Catholic, but as the boot came off I told Jamie he would have to take it easy and if he didn't the boot would come back. We decided on the codeword "Boot" for when he needed to settle down and it's actually helped. The other day he was jumping up and down, as is his wont, and then suddenly he stopped and clapped a hand over his mouth. "What?" we asked, and he replied simply, almost reverently: "Boot."

Happily, he is reporting much less pain so it seems all is healing well.

Dear Santa

Christmas time is on in the Costello house of course. The boys are counting down the days. Connor is of course much more aware of the whole business than Jamie was at this age, thanks to Jamie. This is Jamie's letter to Santa. Every bit of it, including the spelling, he did himself, though Sarah gave him a mock-up of the Santa picture to work from.

I will transcribe it exactly: "Der Santa Jamie Ples giv we Str Wrs Legos transformers double bladed light sabre dans gontlet." (This latter is a reference to a popular anime show, "Bakugan".)

Jamie is grappling with the reality of Santa. He has asked us straight up if Santa is real and we've pretty much lied, though in our minds we are answering with reference to metaphorical notions of Santa as a manifestation of the spirit of giving, etc, rather than his literal existence. Jamie was growing more and more suspicious, asking questions like how old is Santa and will he die. He is also onto the reindeer and their ability to fly with no wings. He has seen Amazon boxes coming to the house but we told him that Santa is not averse to technology and uses Amazon to bring some of the toys ahead of time. Jamie thought that sensible. He thinks Santa will be very tired after going around the world in one night, but that it will be OK because Santa is clearly nocturnal. This is Jamie's favorite word, because he feels that he too, is nocturnal (this is used to suggest that us keeping him from staying up late is not just unfair but is in fact attempting to reverse nature). He also asked about the volume of mail going to the North Pole this time of year and whether it was just one mail carrier bringing all the letters to Santa. I reassured him that they hired some extra seasonal help.

Oddly, the other thing that seems to have have kept all this skepticism at bay, aside I think from some desire to keep believing, is the elves. We've explained to him that Santa has elves to help make the toys and that is plausible to him. We were talking yesterday and he said he didn't want to be an elf because they had to work so hard to make all the toys. We agreed that they probably get a couple of weeks of vacation after Christmas. So should we all!

What we're thankful for

We had a lovely Thanksgiving holiday with the boys. They are getting to the age where days off from school seem less like long stretches of trying to find ways to keep them entertained and more like spending good time together and having fun. That morning we went downtown to see the parade. We had watched it on TV last year and there had been interest so we figured why not? On the whole the boys liked it. Jamie sensed the possibility of concessions and so began angling for cotton candy very quickly and lost some interest in the parade itself. To be fair it was hard to see.

Connor stayed a little more engaged. At some point a float sponsored by one of the local sports teams went by, featuring several cheerleaders. Connor watched their progress down the street with his mouth agape. Then came some clowns on bicycles. His face soured. Sarah asked him if he thought the clowns were fun. He replied, "No I don't like clowns. Are there more beautiful girls?"

Jamie's deep question of the day

Jamie likes to hit you with deep questions with little or no warning. Today, they are off from school and some friends were coming over so I took the boys out to get bagels. As we were getting of the car, Jamie broke his usual stream of consciousness talk and said, "Dad, why did God make mosquitoes?" Now my usual approach to such a question would be to bring in the "best possible world" idea of philosophical optimism, meaning that if there is something bad in the world it is only so because it has to be there to do something good as well. I was trying to figure out how to apply this to mosquitoes, when it became clear that Jamie had already pursued this line of thought. "I mean," he went on, "is there ANYTHING good about mosquitoes?" We agreed that there was not, but that left me pretty stumped for an answer, or at least a good one.

Hide and seek

This is a big game right now with the boys of course and can be lots of fun. Connor gets really into it, though he's not quite gotten the idea of staying hidden. Generally, while you count he goes off to hide as normal, but when you finish he immediately comes running out gleefully saying "You found me!!"

Yesterday after school I took the boys to Chick-fil-A for dinner. This is sort of a Monday tradition. There is a jungle gym there so after we ate we went to play. Jamie of course wanted all of us to play hide and seek, but it's a kid-size jungle gym so it's pretty tough for me to really disguise myself. So he and Connor played, which was funny to watch. There are two benches in the corner where the seeker goes to count, and a little Connor-sized gap in between them. When Jamie started counting Connor, with a very sneaky look on his face, began settling into the gap, and so placed himself approximately 1 foot from Jamie. "Connor," I said, "go hide where Jamie can't see you." Of course, he got a wounded look on his face and said, "But I WANT to hide HERE!" Okay, sorry, I said. So Jamie finished counting, looked at Connor and said "I found you!" My how they laughed. Shows what I know.

So this took about 8 seconds because Jamie counts very fast. Then it's Jamie's turn to hide and Connor's to count. This is produces an almost opposite result. Connor is to count to twenty. So he slowly begins, "One.............................two..............................free..............." and so on until after some time he reaches "firteen.........fourteen........................sixteeen..........................eleventeen...." Here Jamie interjects from his hiding spot several feet away, "Conno. Eleventeen is not a number." "Oh," Connor says.

So now he begins again. "One.............................two..............................free..............." Eventually, it's back to "firteen.........fourteen..................sixteeen.......................... eleventeen........................eight, nine...............................twenty-free............ twenty-four..............." Realizing that having skipped twenty he was going to keep going indefinitely, I cheerfully interjected "Twenty, Connor! Go find Jamie!" I got the hurt look and he said, "NO!!! I want to do it." Then a pause, followed by: "One.............................two............. .................free..............."

The advantages of a varied diet

Jamie and Connor absolutely love feeding Annibelle. She gets wet food in the morning and at night and they are both desperate to be the ones delivering the food. Except that it kind of freaks them out. Having Annibelle meowing anxiously and winding around their feet while one of them holds the bowl seems to make them unable to put it down, which just makes Annibelle more excited. Jamie will eventually put it down, laughing all the while, but Connor will start to cry and eventually will drop the bowl and run away, which is messy. So now, when it is Connor's turn Jamie restrains Annibelle while Connor makes a break for it. He then sets the dish down and takes off before she gets there.

Jamie is always pleased by how excited she is and likes to say "Annibelle, do you think it's your birthday?" as he's delivering the Whiskas. Apparently, however, he does not wish to be treated in the same way. Breakfast is always a battle with him, but lately we've been having success with waffles, to go with the inevitable Gummi-bear vitamins. I've also been giving him raisins lately since this one fruit he'll eat pretty reliably. When we find something that workds with him we tend to try and ride it as long as we can, so we'd given this to him for a few days in a row and were pleased with the consistent success.

But on Saturday morning I produced this meal and he sighed exasperatedly and said, "Dad...I'm not Annibelle! I don't want the same thing every day."

Figures of speech, pt. 2

I forgot of course, a couple of characteristic Jamie- and Connor-isms. One of Connor's other ones is a common one I'm sure: "Amnals" for animals. It is indescribably cute to hear. Also, I wish I could describe how he says "Jamie". It's something like "Dszjamie" but the whole first syllable is very soft. And one of Jamie's signature pronunciations, which I have no idea where it comes from is to change the "a" for an "i" in words like "have" and "has". So, a question comes out, "Dada, hiv you ever seen a number bigger than one million trillion billion? I hiv. Will his too."

Gank-oo!

One of the ways in which we sense the passage of time as the boys get older is with their changing speech. They both have these wonderful idiosyncrasies of speech and to be honest we are always a little sad when they learn the "correct" pronunciations. One of our favorite Jamie-isms (now long gone) was his rendering of "button": first "boppum" and then "but-TOOM". Another one that lasted until very recently was his thinking that a knife was "an ife". We did absolutely nothing to correct him and were hoping he would go off to college still saying it this way. His speech is very good now of course, but one little quirk is that he sometimes renders "t" sounds in the middle or at the end of words as a "ck". So when he marches into our room in the morning to announce that it's time to get up, we hear: "ICK's 7!!!" And lately he's been doing well with the activity of "conneck the docks".

Part of the problem with Connor is that Jamie feels compelled to correct him all the time, so we fear the loss of his little mistakes will come too quickly. One of his best is "Hangaber" for hamburger. It really is much more pleasing to say it this way, try it. Everytime Connor says it, we hush Jamie before he can swoop in to highlight the mistake. Connor still persists in saying "th" at the beginning of words as "g" and switching an "f" for "th" in the middle or at the end of words. Thus, if he wants you to come sit and read a book he will say "May you come and sit wiff me?" And when you do: "Gank-oo!!"

Our little outlaw

As much as Jamie likes to test the limits of our rules, as far as society as a whole goes, he is a very good little citizen. Last year I took him to a Rice football game. Knowing that he would be thirsty, and knowing that all you can get are $4 lemonades there, I decided we would bring in a full sippy cup. Technically this is verboten, but nobody was going to really give us a hard time. Knowing that Jamie likes secrets and games, I figured it would be fun to hide the cup so I told him I would put it in my coat and sneak it in. He got very quiet and then said, "Dad, I really don't want to bring it in. Can we leave in the car?" I felt a little sheepish but didn't think about it much again until...

This weekend we went to the zoo. As we got back to the car, Jamie played a joke by saying "Hey, this isn't our car, why are you getting in it?" Again, thinking to get in on the funny joke I said, "You're RIGHT, Jamie. But let's get in anyway." He asked what I meant and as I opened the doors to our car said, thinking again that this was a joke he had started, "Just get in, we'll steal this car." Jamie became alarmed. "I don't like this," he said. "It makes my tummy hurt." Turns out he was talking about the car next to us. He's been bringing it up all week too. Tonight at dinner he asked my why I had done that and said that just thinking about it made his tummy hurt again. Bad Daddy. Bad Daddy.

Halloween

This is, for Jamie in particular, a glorious time of the year. First Halloween, then his birthday, then Christmas. He has said multiple times lately that he loves his birthday date because Christmas comes so soon after. Even if it is unspoken there is some suggestion in there that Connor is unlucky to have his birthday almost as far away from Christmas as possible.

But both boys clearly enjoyed Halloween, as you can see. Jamie's costume is that of a clone trooper. He had settled on this over the summer and stuck with it admirably over the intervening months. There was some concern on his part because of his awareness of the relation of clone troopers (good) and storm troopers (bad). He is deeply invested in being on the good side of the Star Wars good/evil dichotomy and this seemed something of a grey area, but he worked it out.

I would hasten to point out that the picture of Connor sleeping was actually on the way home from a Halloween party well before trick-or-treating even began. We were very excited to experience Halloween in our new neighborhood and it was a nice scene, though not nearly as crazy as Carolyn and Chris's street. We went around a couple of blocks near the house with a boy from down the street and one of Jamie's other friends. The big boys got into the act very quickly dashing from door-to-door, giving a good trick-or-treat, grabbing as much as they were allowed, then offering a perfunctory thank-you over their shoulders as they dashed off for the next score. Connor, of course, trailed along behind, monkey ears and tail bouncing along with his short, quick steps. At one point he was far enough behind that as he was going up the walk to the door, the owner, not seeing him began closing the door and it shut more or less in his face. He began sobbing of course, and the woman quickly opened the door and put things right. They all also learned that some places allowed them to take 2 or even 3 things from the bowl and would happily proclaim this. This led to a dejected Connor shuffling down the walk from a house of greater moderation saying, "I only got one!"

I think that some of Jamie's rush, aside from the sheer desire for more stuff, stemmed from the fact that he sensed that somehow the normal rules had been lifted. These would normally disallow a) knocking on random people's doors b) taking candy from said random people and c) eating more than one piece of said candy in any 24-hour period. When we got back to the house, he and his friend seemed to want to eat as much as possible before we regained our senses and the normal, draconian, rules were put back in place. This hasn't quite fully happened yet, I'm afraid.

The Reader

While we have loved St. Catherine's, I have to confess that there have been times over the past year when we have wondered whether Jamie might not benefit from a more structured environment. Our biggest concern was his reading, or lack thereof. Fortunately, we kept the faith, and suddenly in the last 2-3 weeks the penny has dropped and he is reading like a maniac. It's funny, we are often saying that Jamie's behavior as a 5, almost 6, year-old is exactly consistent with his behavior as a 6 day, 6 week-old and sure enough he has followed his usual pattern here. He did not get teeth, for instance, for ages and then got them all at once. He did not walk until he was 18 months, but then he was running a day later (Thus proving the old adage wrong. To wit, you almost can run before you can walk!).

It used to be a little hard to tell when he was reading or not because he has such an incredible memory that he could recite books that we hadn't read in months word for word. But he proved his new skill the other day on a totally unfamiliar subject. We had been talking somehow or other about Tasmanian Devils and he was asking us what they looked. We had to admit that we didn't know either. Well, the next week he comes home with a book about them. We asked how he had found it, since he wouldn't have recognized a picture and he said, with a bit of a teenage exasperation, "I READ the title, of course!" In one sense, he is clearly enjoying this new skill, and is voraciously devouring text whereever he finds. In another sense, though, he is surprisingly casual about it.

He does like to lord this ability over Connor, as with his math skills. But for his part Connor is moving forward too. He was drawing the other day and then proclaimed, "Come look! I wrote my name!" Sarah and I proceeded over ready to see only scribbles and say "Oh that's so nice sweetie," but we were a little speechless to see, in jumbled form albeit, the rather well-formed letters C-O-N-N-O-R.

Good times

Jamie continues to thrive in soccer. He scored, I think, two goals this week, but I was especially pleased that he and another boy, Christopher, actually passed the ball to each other, twice no less. In 4-5 year-old soccer this is something akin to a miracle, and I especially like that when I congratulated Jamie after the game, he mentioned the passes very proudly.

Connor, on the other hand, seems to view the soccer field as a kind of stage on which he can play out a series of pouts and tantrums. He took part in the practice section of the day on a limited basis, as usual, only holding Sarah's hand. He then refused to play in the game of course. But we tried the old "Well, you're too young to play anyway," trick on him, which actually worked. Until we had to put a scrimmage jersey on him. This was clearly unacceptable and he went to the mattresses. So we all went to watch Jamie's game. This also angered Connor, who had decided that he wanted to stand IN the goal while his friends played and wanted Mommy in there with him too (Goal is about 3 feet high). Eventually he walked off towards the bleachers by himself, so Sarah went after him. A little sweet talk and some playing on the bleachers and he was ready to come back to the reservation. As they were walking by the fields, now empty as everyone headed for snacks, Connor sighed contentedly and said, "Good times."

A numbers game

Guest entry from Sarah:

Leo has gone to London for a week, so I’ve hijacked the blog from him. I lack his humorous style, so bear with me. As a little background to the story that follows, a couple of nights ago I went to the kids’ school for “parent education night,” when the teachers teach us about how they teach our kids. It’s a Montessori school, and most of us aren’t too familiar with the methods, so these nights help us decode what we hear about their day at school. Math was the subject of the night. Jamie has been very into math lately, so I was quite interested.

So, our first activity this weekend was soccer. Jamie was a little sad afterwards because he hadn’t scored any goals, although he had played well. Jamie asked Connor how many goals he had scored in his little game, of which he had played all of five minutes, and Connor thought for a minute (clearly assessing how far he could push the exaggeration), and said, “ummm…. five hundred.”

Later, we were in the car between birthday parties, and Jamie started a game with Connor involving math. He would quiz Connor with questions like, “what comes after three?” On the easy ones, Connor was getting maybe 50%. But then Jamie made things a little tougher, and starting asking addition and subtraction questions, and it was all over for poor little Connor, who had no clue. Example:

Jamie: What’s 2 + 2?

Connor: Ummm, 100?

Yeah, good guess. It was pretty funny to listen to, and passed the time in the car. Connor is fascinated enough by numbers that he didn’t care how often he was wrong, which helped maintain the good moods.

So they do get tired...

As many of you know the old "that'll really tire them out" thing doesn't seem to work as often as one thinks it will. However, we have evidence in the first picture that occasionally it does happen. This was taken at about 8:15 PM, Sunday night after a busy, fun weekend. It began with soccer on Saturday morning. Jamie is doing great. He played in a game where he was one of the older students but he was sort of a star, breaking away from the mob around the ball and dribbling for several goals. Connor is playing too, though on his own terms to be sure. This involves mainly holding Mommy's hand through all practice activities. For the game that followed, he kicked the ball once and then left the field immediately, to be held by Daddy while I "reffed" another game.

We have been cutting out Connor's afternoon nap lately in an attempt to get him out of the habit of being awake until 9:00 every night, so we had lunch and pretty much went right out, first to the garden store for some plants and then off to the Fire Festival, where there were bouncy castles and fire trucks to be climbed on and cotton candy to be eaten.

Sunday consisted of some good play time in the morning, followed by a play date at a friend's down the street. Then we went to the pumpkin patch where the boys did more bouncy castles, looked at snakes and turles, picked pumpkins and won prizes. Then another trip to the garden store. Finally we got home and everybody cozied up in our bed for popcorn and a movie. Dinner and bath followed and then books.

Connor made it through the first 2 books and then fell sound asleep. The picture is actually about 2 minutes after Sarah tried to take him to bed. He woke up and said, angrily, "NOOO!!! I want to 'nuggle on the couch!!" So she put him back and he fell asleep again. When books were done I picked him up to take him to bed and this time he gestured grumpily towards the light sabre next to him on the couch. Having gotten that firmly in hand he went willingly to bed, where he fell deeply asleep with the light sabre still grasped firmly. Jamie was fascinated by this and still quite alert, but he he fell asleep about 2 minutes after getting in bed.

Iron clad alibi

Jamie is actually turning into quite a helpful family member. He is very fond of yard work and especially loves doing what he calls the "outside vacuum", in which we suck up leaves and grass clippings for the compost. He also likes to clean and can be turned loose with a Swiffer, small (inside) vacuum or a damp rag and genuinely contribute to household maintenance. He and Connor also like to fight for who goes out and gets the paper from the lawn in the morning. We went to the garden store today and he impressed us by carrying bags of rocks and two rather large plants to the cart.

He is a bit selective of course and some things just don't interest him, very often the kinds of things we'd like him to do, such as carrying his trash out of the car or helping to carry all his school things into the house when we get home. Tonight we had a bit of a mystery in that the laundry machine had stopped running and the top was open. Now this is a little fraught because with Connor still potty-training, suffice it to say, the laundry is serious business and needs to get done, and the right way. So Sarah asked me if I had opened it, and then naturally turned to Jamie. He answered very quickly, while running through the room, "No...I don't care about that stuff."

Heartbreaking moment of the day

We've had the sense that Connor has been very happy at his school and I think he is. We also figured that since he is around Jamie and his friends so much he wouldn't have too much trouble with the fact that he would be the youngest kid in the classroom, since Montessori mixes ages 3-6 at this level. Jamie has been very into show and tell lately, bringing in for instance a large number of cicada moltings he had collected (Sarah did not enjoy this) and a photobook of his trip to Cyprus. So on the way to school he was talking about this, so Sarah asked Connor if his classroom did show and tell as well. He replied, "I don't go to show and tell because I feel small." Sarah was a little speechless at first and asked if the big kids were nice to him and he said yes. Sometimes it just ain't easy being small I guess.

Looking out for #2

Connor has to look out for himself, there is no question about it. He is very very quick to speak up if he feels that Jamie is getting anything that he is not. As noted in the previous post, he also likes to deliberately take the contrary position to Jamie, just to test out who is going to get his way. Poor thing, really, it must seem like he has to watch out for disadvantage at every turn. We had told Jamie as a part of a developing chores plan that if, among other things, he cleared his plate after every meal, he would get an allowance. Jamie took it a bit more literally. He brought his plate to the sink after breakfast yesterday and then demanded some money. We explained to him the way it would work and he was satisfied. Connor, however, was clearly listening, because he looked up and said "Is Jamie going to get ALL the money??" No, we said. Connor replied succinctly, "Good," and went back to his coloring.

What a boy wants

On Wednesdays this semester I pick the boys up at 3:15. Sarah isn't usually home until 5:30 or so, so I like to take the boys for an ice cream and some kind of activity. Last week after our frozen treat we went to Hermann Park. There is an outdoor theater there, with a big grassy hill where people can sit. Because we have two Houston boys, who have grown up looking at a completely flat landscape, this is fascinating. So we played on the hill. The boys like to run down the hill with me at the bottom, trying to run past without me catching them. I have to walk a fine line between seeming like I really am trying to catch them, but not actually doing so.

As is almost always the case just we have gotten somewhere, Jamie announced he needed the potty so off we went to take care of that. Public bathrooms with the two of them are always a bit of an adventure ("Connor! Don't touch ANYTHING!!"). Finally, we got some good hill running in. Jamie then declared he wanted to go to the dinosaur museum, across the street. Connor, sensing an opportunity, announced that he did not want to go, thus ensuring that I would displease one of them. In this case, I opted against going because it was getting late and the boys get very cranky if their blood sugar gets low. Apparently, however, this had already happened as Jamie had a meltdown. Even as I know I'm doing the right thing, of course, part of me always feels bad in not giving them what they want. But then later, having calmed down a bit, Jamie announced, in EXACTLY the same tone that he had said he wanted to go to the museum, that he wanted to go to Pluto and he wanted to go when he was still a kid. This reassures me, actually, by making it clear that no matter what there will always be something else he wants and he will never understand why he can't have it all.

Little brother moments

Poor Connor has been having a lot of them lately. This is the price of greater comprehension of the kinds of games that he Jamie are likely to play. Of course, everything is a race between them. For a while this was fine because Connor didn't really understanding what winning meant. Jamie would say "C'mon Connor let's race!" and dash off somewhere. He would of course arrive first and begin shouting "I win! Yea!" Connor would get there eventually and just blithly copy Jamie, since that's what he does. He was usually happy enough doing so not to notice Jamie's voice saying, "No Connor, you lost!"

But now, alas, it's all too clear. A little morning ritual lately has been the race from the backdoor to the car, which, of course Jamie wins. Connor, now understanding perfectly the nature of a race, gets 3/4 of the way and when Jamie announces "I won!" begins sobbing, absolutely sobbing saying "IIIII WAAAAAANTEEDD TO WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!" It helps a little if I tell him he beat me, but not much. Jamie meanwhile can be seen strapping himself into his car seat with an expression of great self-satisfaction on his face.

Like a candle

As noted, we tend to get very little information from the boys about school. Connor is actually even more reticent than Jamie, although we recently learned that he has two buddies at school named Claire and John. Claire, he tells us, sometimes whines, but John does not. Neither, he says, does Connor. In the car the recently with Sarah coming home from school they both busted out singing a song they must all be working on called "Light a candle." It is a very St. Catherine's song. Jamie can do it all the way through, but Connor just loops the first verse, changing "light" to "like". Without anything to stop him, he will go on singing "Like a candle for peace, like a candle for love, like a candle for the whole world," more or less indefinitely. Inevitably, when one sings the other wants to as well and they begin fighting so the sounds of "Light/like a candle for peace" are mixed with the increasingly angry protestations of first one child and then the other. It's quite moving.

Connor is actually quite the performer. Last night as we sat down to dinner, he suddenly announced, "I have to go sing in the hallway!" So he marched off to the other room, where we could hear him singing "Like a candle" to noone, and then came back in and sat down.

The Kielt clan in particular will also be curious to know that whenever he has pants and no shirt on he begins dancing around saying "Hot stuff! Hot stuff!" You see at one of the children's spectacular shows in Punta Cana Connor's group appeared on stage, shirtless, with red pants and were instructed to dance to the song "Hot Stuff!" Most did nothing and Connor stood there with his woobie and pacifier looking bewildered, leading to much hilarity. Guess he just needs to decide on his own time and place for Hot Stuff!

Why oh why?

This is, I'm afraid, a completely standard parental lament so I apologize in advance. But how is it that children know to sleep in only on the days when not only does it not do their parents any good, but actually makes things harder?

The boys have been running on empty a bit lately. Jamie managed to earn us a reproof recently from his teacher because he spent much of the day at school lolling about saying he was to tired to do anything, so of course we got the "get them to bed early" speech. Really this is just what we get for having two boys with opposite sleep habits in the same room. Jamie, left to his own devices, will fall asleep quite quickly (assuming a detailed list of conditions has been adequately met). Connor, on the other hand, views his first entry into bed as merely the first act in an elaborate drama, which may go on for hours, featuring various excursions around the house, reading books, playing with toys and generally a lot of noise. So on the one hand we've got him keeping Jamie up. On the other hand in the morning, Jamie is up by 6:30 watching the clock like a hawk for the magic hour, when he pronounces victoriously, "It's 7!!!" (the phrase has become synonymous in Connor's mind to "time to get up" so he says when he wakes up no matter what time it is) and the day begins. Connor, left to his own devices, would happily go on sleeping, but the prospect of being up with Jamie is too much to resist, so he usually gets up too. Hence they are tired all day.

Having done this all weekend, and all summer for that matter, this morning, Monday, ie. schoolday, of course, they sleep in. We have already been up showering and getting meals ready for them and they are snoozing away at 7:30. Sarah went in and rustled about, opening windows hoping to roust them but it produces no discernible effect, where usually the slightest noise from our side of the happway will produce eager inquiries into our state of wakefulness. How, how how do they know to do this? Finally, she woke Jamie up and he reanimated pretty quickly. Connor, however, tried to ignore her and stay in bed, rolling over and covering his face with his woobie. Occasionally, he does this, though more often at nap time. Once weekend, when a nap threatened to push 3 hours and throw nighttime schedules completely off, I went into his room and gently shook him, saying "Time for bunnies to wake up." He opened his eyes slightly, and mumbled "Time for bunny sleepies," and rolled back over. This morning, however, Sarah was persistent and so finally Connor bounced up and declared triumphantly, "It's 7!"

Connor still speaks French

Connor's abilities as a mimic are impressive. He copies absolutely everything that Jamie does, of course, because Jamie is the most interesting person in the world. But Connor does manage to find time to copy us. Since spelling is becoming a less effective means of masking what we are saying from Jamie, we have taken to speaking French to each other when we need to communicate something we don't want them to hear. Fortunately, this is generally pretty simple stuff, like should we let them have cookies. But I guess it becomes habit because we've been hearing a number of French phrases mirrored back to us by little Connor. He sometimes comes running into the room and presents himself with a "Woila!" And my favorite of all, when Jamie sends up the call from the bathroom, "I need a cleanup!", Connor will say, a little wearily, "J'arrive!".

Fall in Houston!

OK, not really. Living in Houston, we have come not to expect big seasonal changes. One doesn't get fall at all really, let alone anything like "indian summer." On the other hand, we have learned to be attentive to the slightest fluctuations in whether and lo and behold September 1st was noticeably not as god-awful hot as August has been. So Sarah very intelligently took the boys outside when they got home, it being the first day in months that it wasn't too hot to be out of doors and not in a pool.

They had a picnic and then started up an exciting game of freeze-tag, which quickly morphed in unpredictable ways. First of all Connor, even though he frequently says, tauntingly, "Come and get me!" and runs away, looking back over his shoulder to make sure you are following, doesn't liked to be chased. His laughs change almost imperceptibly into a high-pitched "Noooo!" He also has the habit when he is scared of putting one or both hands up to his mouth. It looks almost comically theatrical but is very geniunley felt. So, it was decided, in consultation with Jamie, that Connor had a special power that he couldn't be frozen. This reassured Connor considerably, but he then decided his special power meant that he could hold his hands out and zap Sarah with some kind of light energy, like the Emperor did to Luke Skywalker at the end of Return of the Jedi. So, while not chasing Connor, but not excluding him from the game, Sarah had to show that this power was affecting her. Further complicating things was the fact that Jamie of course now wanted to have a special power, which turned out to be to make Sarah move very slowly. So she had to chase two boys while being slowed by one and knocked down/electrocuted by other. Being a mom is a real balancing act sometimes!

It ain't easy bein' free (that's 3 in Connor speak)

Connor has it pretty good around here, but there is no question that being the smallest boy can be tough. We had one of Jamie's friends and his parents over today. Generally, they were pretty nice to Connor, although there was a brief game of "Let's battle Connor," which we out a stop to quickly. The main thing that is difficult for Connor is that things simply move too fast, try as he may to keep up. This is most obvious of course when we set off for the pool and the two big boys are off down the block in a flash, with poor Connor a mile behind them, his little legs whirring away desperately.

But we saw another vivid example after dinner. The boys each had a brownie for dessert, but of course wanted more. Approaching from 3 directions they swooped in on the plate where there was just one brownie and some crumbs left. First they tried to con us into leaving the room, but somehow we saw through their ploy. So, Jamie and his friend now knew the brownie was off limits but yelled "Crumbs" and charged forward, little fingers grasping everywhere. Connor meanwhile echoed the call and went straight for the brownie. Admirable ambition, but I swooped in and put it out of reach, so he turned to a larger crumb. Jamie grabbed this so Connor moved to another smaller one only to see that swiped by the friend. He was just moving in on the only remaining, miniscule morsel, a single grain of brownie, when the tip of Jamie's finger came in and picked it away. This all happened in the blink of an eye and poor Connor just looked bewildered. Don't worry, the boys soon tore off like a swarm of locusts to lay waste to another field and I gave Connor a good bite of the remaining brownie.

First day of school! First day of school!

Title is a Nemo reference of course. Yes, the boys are back at school. Here's the picture of them heading off that morning.

Connor had his first full week this week, though he had had some short days the week before. Last year it was quite clear that Connor wanted to go to school with Jamie very badly. We would always drop Jamie before taking Connor to school and by the end of the year he would just cry as Jamie got out of the car and say "I wan' go school wiff JAMIE!!!!!" Now that he can he seems pleased enough, but he has already learned from Jamie to give absolutely nothing away. We ask if he liked it and he says "Yeah." What did you do, we ask. "I don't remember." Do you have any buddies? "Yeah." What are their names? "I don't remember." You get the pattern. Except that, just to mess with us I think, when we asked if he liked his teacher he said "Nope. Not one bit." (That's a classic Jamie phrase). But he does always seem in a very good mood when he comes home so I think he is happy. The one detail we get consistently is that he used the potty and washed his hands. At age 3, we're pretty willing to consider anything more as gravy.

Self-awareness

Just a quick snippet here. We still call Connor bunny, I guess because he is very cute and he hops around a lot. Happily he still let us. As Sarah was giving him kisses the other day she asked him, "Connor do you know why I like to kiss you so much?"
"Because you are love me? And I'm cute?"

We've had one accident-free day at the jobsite!

Yes, that's right folks, Connor went a whole day using the potty and had no accidents! He is extremely pleased with himself and we are too, since it raises the possibility that he could actually go to the school we are paying for this Fall! For whatever reason until very recently, he just wasn't getting it and didn't seem to want to. All the bribes and big boy talk in the world couldn't make him want to do it, but something has clicked and he has been improving almost exponentially. Yesterday was a little challenging because he would go and then tell us he needed the potty, but even this was progress. Sarah had cleverly said that he would get a sticker and marshmallow for every time he went in the potty and he is loving that of course.

She also cleverly enlisted Jamie's help by saying that if he encouraged Connor he would get a marshmallow too, so he is pretty into it. On the other hand, he is not wild for all the attention this means Connor gets. Yesterday he said sadly to me. "I wish everyone was involved in my potty too." We've been trying to be as encouraging as possible, I can assure you.

The waterboy

A new chapter has been added to Jamie's swimming adventure. Just one day after his Dad snorkeled for the first time, Jamie went out himself. He was very brave about it and did a great job. We had gotten him an underwater camera for the trip and he had already been snapping away (results will be posted when we finish the roll). I had been so impressed already with his swimming in the ocean. Although the water was shallow, the current was very strong. One day, we were swimming, without snorkels and Jamie was taking pictures. He was incredibly composed, putting his face in the water while pointing the camera, shooting, advancing and shooting again, all with his head under water, and all the while bobbing on the waves with his wee legs kicking away to maintain his position.

Cousin/Cousine

By far, the boys' favorite thing about Club Med was having their cousins around. We got there about 3:30 on a Saturday afternoon and within about 1/2 hour they were all in the pool climbing all over each other and Pops and blasting each other with water guns. Jamie and Liam always have a great time because they are close in both age and spirit, but Jamie was in Finn's group at the Mini Club Med so it was great that the two of them got to be silly together. And Connor and Emma hit it off particularly well. She was so sweet with him, watching after him and helping him. At some point he was trying to climb up one of the ladders to go down the waterslide and a bigger kid was trying to push him out of the way. Emma formed a kind of human wall and shielded Connor while he made his way up the ladder. One night as we were going to dinner, Jamie went running off after the rest of the cousins. Connor did his little move where he runs in place like the RoadRunner before zipping off saying, "I goin' get the cousins!" Later we said, "Connor, aren't cousins great?" "Yeah," he said with great earnestness, "and Emma is the BEST!!"

Kitty cat!

Well, we have a new family member. Sarah's parents brought their cat Annabelle, who was almost my cat many years ago, to stay with us, now that they are splitting time between North and South. The boys could not possibly be more excited. They were unable to go to sleep the night that they all arrived and have followed her every move ever since and proclaimed her the best cat ever. The first full night she was here, Jamie eagerly brought her food over to her and then sat down cross-legged a couple of feet away to watch her eat. "Connor!" he said excitedly, "she's EATING! It's AWESOME!!" Connor ran over and plopped himself down too and they watched the rest of the show in reverent silence. Connor will also exclaim whenever he sees her do the most basic of cat activities. For instance, "LOOK!!!! Annabelle got down off the chair!!!"

The boys had gone to the store with Sarah the previous week to get some supplies for Annabelle and had very thoughtfully decided to get her a present, namely some little catnip mice, and they like to bring them to her while she lies down. She looks like quite the Queen with her courtiers bringing their tributes. By and large Annabelle deals with all the attention gracefully and patiently, and the boys are really very good about touching her gently and not chasing her too much. It brings out the snuggly side of Jamie too. He said, "I like hugging Annabelle. Her fur is very soft and I can hear her heart beating."

Jamie and Connor at Club Med

We're all having quite the time here at Club Med in the Dominican Republic. The boys have been at the Mini-Club Med all week and of course have claimed not to like it much, but it's not at all clear that they haven't had a pretty good time. The first day, Jamie reported that his favorite part of the day had been going to the pool. He then reported that the scariest part of his day had been going on the flying trapeze. WHAT?? we asked. Yes, it turns out that Jamie, hooked quite safely in, had climbed up to about 30 feet and swung out into space on the trapeze. We later learned that in fact he wasn't supposed to, as his group is too young, but while his group was working on the adjacent, lower, tight-rope, he seems to have plopped himself down in the line for the trapeze and from there dutifully did what he was told. Unfortunately, we didn't have any pictures of this, but when you see the ones of Sarah up there, you'll see just what a feat this was for our brave little boy. Having done it, however, Jamie says that he does not wish to go again.

One of the funny things about the trip is the predominance of French guests and language here. Much is done in 3 languages but when push comes to shove French is definitely the lingua franca, as it were. One of the persistent jokes of the week has been telling his cousins Erik and Emma that Connor knows French. Jamie's caretakers, "G.O."s in the lingo here, do a fair amount of English but the younger they get the less English so Connor hears almost exclusively French during the day. The joke started because one afternoon Sarah joined his group for a snack. As Connor was munching some Cheerio's one of the G.O.'s asked in rather rapid French "Veux-tu du lait Connor?" He responded with his particular way of nodding, a kind of steady bobbing of the head with a brief pause at the top and eyes wide open. Now, the other joke is that Connor is a yes-man, as in generally inclined to answer in the affirmative to any question, but all the same Erik and Emma have spent all week befuddled by the idea that Connor has already learned French.

Jamie, meanwhile, has become interested in French. Last night, he and Sarah were at the smaller of the pools here. They were having a good time playing with a football, throwing it sothat Jamie would try and catch it as he lept off the side of the pool. This very cute little girl, a bit older than Jamie, began sort of hanging around and watching them very closely. Sarah asked if she'd like to play and she immediately responded, "Je le veux bien!!" Turns out out that her name is Marie and she and Jamie hit it off famously. As Sarah and Jamie left she asked if he would come again the next day. He did and a fine time was had so it seems that Jamie's "chick magnet" ability, as Nonni puts it, translates into French. Earlier today he asked me how we sounded to French people and then said he wanted to be able to understand French and speak French. I asked if this was because of Marie and he said "Yeah. And I just want to be able to understand." Tonight as she left the pool he gave Marie a lovely "Au revoir."

Can't have one without...

Jamie was at camp this week with his best buddy Will. He enjoyed himself very much and occasionally reasons other than Will were given for why he liked camp, and even other kids were referenced from time to time. But mostly it's all about Will.

Connor and I went today to the camp-ending "talent show" and awards ceremony today. The talent portion of the program consisted of some fun songs that the kids had learned. Jamie did not sing and seemed slightly inconvenienced to have to be quiet while the other kids did. I asked him later and he said simply that he doesn't like singing. Then they gave out awards. Each kid got one, for accomplishments like "most spirited", "Best dress-up princess", "Best block-builder," etc. Of course I was very interested to hear what Jamie's award would be. But as soon as the presenter said "This is our only award that is going to TWO campers" I knew what was coming. Sure enough, Jamie and Will shared the "Best buddies" award for being such good friends to each other, and it was added, to everybody else. Cute. One of the other teachers commented as they came to get their ribbons together "Can't have one without the other!"

Birthday boy

Here are some pics of the birthday party at the pool.

Breakfast with Connor

Here's a word for word account of my conversation with Connor about his breakfast. Having eaten some cereal and blueberries to start, Connor saw me fixing my breakfast and proclaimed, "I'm still hungry! I want more break-fist".
"OK," I said, "what do you want?"
He answered as is often his wont, "Lotsa stuff."
"OK, what kind of stuff?"
"Lotsa stuff!"
"How about some cereal and milk?"
"Yeah."
Then, as I am preparing to pour the cereal into a bowl, "I don't want that!"
"OK, how about a cream cheese and jelly sandwich?"
"Yeah...What's in a cream cheese and je-yey sandwich?"
"Well, cream cheese and jelly, Connor."
"But I don't like cream cheese and je-yey sandwich. It gives me a headache"
"Yes you do Connor you eat them all the time. And cream cheese and jelly sandwiches don't give anybody a headache."
"I'm not hungry."
"Do you want some blueberries?"
"Yeah...and cereal."

Happy Birthday Connor

Pictures to follow. Just a quick note to say that our little bunny, ahem--big boy--is a happy, tired 3-year-old. He had a great day. Slept in until almost 9:30 then got pancakes, fruit and presents. Jamie was a really good older brother and seemed to vicariously enjoy Connor's present opening.

Connor is already quite used to saying 3 when asked his age, but is still getting the hang of holding three fingers up, which is really much harder than two. He hasn't quite settled on which ones to use and often twists his face in concentration as he tries to get any three of them to come up while two stay down. Sometimes all four fingers go up and he just stares at them trying to figure out how to get one of them, any of them, to curl up and go back into his palm.

He was also a very courteous birthday boy at his party, which we had, where else, at the local pool. When somebody said "Happy Birthday" he often said the same right back. Things got a little tense when we first set things up because--prepare yourselves for something very awful--a fly landed on his pretzels. Fortunately, his people rectified that, not quickly enough to be sure and only after a strongly worded request, and from then on out all was well. Lightning McQueen was the big theme of the day and Sarah got perfect cupcakes from Moeller's Bakery. To be fair, though Connor picked them out. She was explaining various cake options to him, while he walked to the display cases and repeatedly pointed to the chocolate frosted angel food cupcakes with the rainbow sprinkles. He was very clear that these were the RIGHT cupcakes, and so they were.

Girls again

Things are at an interesting point with Jamie because on the one hand he seems like a bit of a boys' boy right now. Not always, but sometimes, he gravitates towards playing with boys over girls and generally seems to know a bit more what to do around boys. On the other hand, there is a clearly a fascination with girls, and he's starting to be able to voice this. He has for sometime noticed when Sarah wears a new outfit, or looks particularly lovely and will say, slightly dreamily, "Mommy looks pretty!" Well, his sense of pretty is expanding. The other day, while watching Scooby-Doo, he remarked that Daphne was pretty (of course this is what is intended by the show. Poor Velma- but she's smart and has a good sense of humor!).

Then yesterday I took the boys to get an ice cream. Soon after we sat down to eat a little girl a bit older than Jamie came in and sat nearby. Before long Jamie and Connor had gotten bored of ice cream and began being silly. Soon I realized that the girl's gaze was absolutely locked on Jamie. He realized too and began doing a real performance for her. Jumping around, running, making silly noises, striking poses, even hitting himself on the head. She didn't smile, but she also didn't frown and really for 15 minutes, her eyes NEVER left him. After she left, Jamie said, "Dad that girl was watching me." I know, I said, did you like that? "Yeah. I kinda liked her because she was pretty." I can't believe this is starting already, on the one hand, on the other hand he is so sweet and guileless about it, it's really cute to watch. In any case it's a far cry from the old days of First Christian where there would be 4 of the prettiest little girls you can imagine screaming "Jamie" and he would hide behind one of us.

Ramps and ottomans

As all who know him or have read this blog will be aware, Connor's favorite activity by far, with perhaps the exception now of being silly with Jamie, is sending matchbox cars down an incline of some kind. There is something distinctly therapeutic about the way he does it, almost losing himself in the effect of gravity on small wheels. What I didn't realize until we went to Nonni and Diddy's house last month was that this is only half of the fun. You see, at home we use an ottoman with the top placed on an angle for the ramp. This has the added benefit of providing a storage space for the masses of cars, of all shapes and sizes, that he has now acquired.

When we got to Maryland, Nonni and Diddy were ready with a ramp and we proudly showed it to him and the cars. Well, very soon Connor is looking anxious and saying "Is der a Ottoooman?" Seems in his mind, an ottoman is an open structure attached to the ramp into which the cars may be placed, having gone back up the ramp. Fortunately, Nonni and Diddy cleverly jury-rigged a ramp and "ottoman" by duct taping a sturdy piece of styrofoam to a small trash pail and he was happy as a clam all week. Doesn't have to be fancy, just has to be what he wants.

The last week that Sarah and Jamie were away, some friends had us over for dinner. They have a divine three-year-old girl named Caroline. When I picked Connor up from school, I told him we were going to Caroline's house. He immediately began calling her "Carolina", which I found very cute. I think it comes from a) his tendency to actually over-complicate longish words (he says "blueblerries" for instance--try saying it, it's tough!) and b) hearing about relatives and basketball teams from North Carolina. Anyway, he immediately asked, "Does Car-o-li-na have cars, and a ramp and a ottoman???!!" Turns out Carolina had all of two cars in the entire house, which had to be dug out. He was none too impressed by her many dolls, but it happens that they have a shared affection for hurling balls around, so a fine time was had.

Connor's life as an only child

There is no question that Connor missed Jamie and Mommy intensely. But there is also no doubt that he got used to being an only child. Connor had, half the family went to Cyprus, been a fairly typical second child is as much as he was accustomed to having to compete with his brother for our attention, and he was fairly used to not having his requests filled as immediately as they always were for Jamie.

Well, all that changed once he realized that with Jamie gone, I really had no purpose other than serving him. He very quickly became very impatient with we. As much as anything, it was my attention that he demanded. When he asked for my attention, he would become indignant if I didn't immediately acknowledge him and shout "DADDY!" One night we were at a friend's for dinner and I was talking to the other grown-ups. Connor was sitting next to me and started asking for my attention. I politely asked him to wait for a moment until I was done talking. After trying twice Connor reached over and put his hands on either side of my face. Then, with me still trying to speak, he used his surprisingly strong little arms and pulled my face around to look at him. Then, with his big blue eyes inches away from mine he said sternly "DADDY!!! LOOK...AT...MEEEEE!" Everyone was very impressed.

Kid friendly

Jamie is fully into the gun phase now. Except that we don't have guns in this house. We have blasters. This is our way of dealing with the irresistible force of the fascination with weapons. He will now transform any object into a "blaster" and go around the house "pew-pow-pew"ing away. Fortunately Jamie's other current obsession is Star Wars, so he is happy to let our all-important semantic distinction pass more or less unremarked. He is also, like Luke Skywalker, very firm in his opposition to the Dark Side, so that's reassuring too.

Actually, Jamie is very good at drawing the line between real and imagined. He feels an enormous pull towards shows that are really for older kids, especially those featuring battles of some kind. We have to balance very carefully between his desires and what is appropriate, but he is actually pretty good about being self-aware and telling us when something is too scary for him. He is also quite able to understand the distinction between real and make-believe on which the blaster/gun separation is based.

The other day in the car he heard something about World War II on the radio and asked if he could watch a show about it. Well, I said that's something that's going to have to wait until you're a little older because it's kind of a grown-up subject and can get pretty scary. He seemed to accept this and then thought for a moment before asking, "Are there any kids' World War II shows?"

Pool time

This has definitely been the summer of the pool. It has been incredibly hot, even for Houston, with temperatures over 100 degrees for several days in a row. But in a way this has pleased Sarah and I for it merely confirms the correctness of our decision to move to a house a block away from the local pool. We have been going more or less every day unless there's some particular reason we can't.

Jamie's swimming continues to improve. He is taking lessons again and despite some of the usual kvetching, he is quite into and very proud of himself. It's been very interesting to watch the simultaneous development of Jamie's swimming skills and his overall sense of confidence and adventurousness. I'm not sure which came first, but it's great to see either way. He can front crawl a good long way now, can swim underwater and can also go down and sit on the bottom of the pool. Perhaps most reassuringly to us, he can also jump into water over his head, come up and swim to the edge. As you can see from the above picture, he has also discovered the belly flop. He is totally unfazed by it of course.

Connor has also started swim lessons. He has never been the least bit afraid of the water, but happily he is beginning to acquire some skills to go along with the attitude. He has been watching Jamie for some time now and so he understands and mimics the basic motions. We have him in a swim vest and he can actually motor himself right along without being held now. It's very cute because he gets this big toothy grin, sticks head up above the water and paddles away. Actually, he looks quite a lot like a dog swimming, especially in the ration of effort to actual movement.

Back at last!

Yes, the title refers, dear readers, to the return of both the blog and Sarah and Jamie from Cyprus. Things have been a bit willy-nilly but in the coming days I will try to fill in what I can remember of the last month.

Jamie and Sarah returned in good order on a Sunday night two weeks ago. Connor and I spent most of the day at the pool, where he said repeatedly "I want go get Mommy and Jamie now!!!!" Try explaining "later" to a 2 year old who wants his mother. Eventually we got them and this time there was no cold shoulder for Mommy when Connor saw her, just hugs all around. Jamie and Sarah both looked amazingly well given that the had just been traveling for about 20 hours. Jamie was immediately concerned with his presents, since he knew that I would have not one but two Star Wars related gifts, both of which pleased him immensely.

He looked like such a big boy and seemed to speak more clearly than even a month before. He is a very good traveller in fact and had enough energy to help pull his luggage to the car. After speed talking for about 15 minutes, he suddenly fell heavily asleep in the car going home. Now, Jamie has NEVER and I mean never, fallen asleep in the car and allowed us to transfer him into bed, not even as an infant. I really genuinely thought this would be the time since he didn't even wake up as we unloaded Connor and the luggage from the car. But no, as soon as I picked him up, he bounced awake and was instantly energized. Sarah bravely kept going for a little bit but soon had to go to bed. Jamie, on the other hand, actually complained about having to go to bed. Where does the energy come from??!!

And, of course, there was no sleep-in the next day, he was up at 7 and ready to go. On the surface of it, he was quite unaffected by jet-lag. He didn't get sleepy in the afternoon and was as ready to fight bed-time as ever. In fact, though, he was pretty emotionally edgy all week and it was clear that deep down he was tired. Suggest that to him at your own risk.

Missing Jamie

Connor and I are certainly not the only ones missing our Jamie. His particular friend at school, Will, is also having hard time. I went by Jamie's school the other day to pick up some stuff we had left there and saw his teacher, Cynthia. She said that poor Will had the impression that Jamie was going to be gone a week (I don't think kids can really conceive of a period too much longer) and so after 7 days was quite indignant that Jamie had returned and sure that some adult had made a mistake. Apparently in art projects Will has been making presents and pictures for Jamie.

Cynthia also said that she'd gotten to know Will better in that week that she had all year, because with Jamie gone Will actually talks to her now. Not to worry all, the dynamic duo will be re-united soon and will spend a week in a day camp together. Interestingly, so will Connor. Assuming we get him potty trained (cue ominous music).

Life with Daddy

Many of you have asked, of course, how things are going for Connor without Mommy around for an extended period. All in all his sunny disposition and love-the-one-you're-with attitude mean that he does just fine. We have been reading a book about Owl Babies whose mother is away (a gift from Megan)and I think this is helping Connor cope. At the end of the book every night he ritualistically repeats the line of one of the owls who says "I want my mommy!" repeatedly. This seems to let him purge his feelings of anxiety over the absence.

I was worried about how he would do sleeping the first night without Jamie in the room as well, but it was no problem. The only issue with going to sleep, in fact, is that before he left Jamie finally realized that being on one floor meant he could get out of bed when he wanted and come find us. So of course Connor learned this too. When I put him to bed, he usually re-emerges from his room at least once, either to get a car, or to return one to the living room. He has also learned from Jamie that when you want to get up, you loudly proclaim "It's 7!!!!!!!" Of course, Connor can't tell what time it is so he will say this at 6:15 if that's when he wakes up and there's no arguing with a 2 year old. He also says it when it's time to get up from a nap.

Interestingly, while he also misses Jamie greatly and asks about them both all the time, Connor is clearly getting used to being the only child. Without Jamie around, it is clear to Connor that I have nothing better to do than serve him, and he has become downright demanding and a little impatient if he doesn't get my attention IMMEDIATELY. Actually, even when he's impatient he very sweet and he's also been much more affectionate with me than ever before, giving me hugs, saying "This is my daddy" and even, gasp, calling me his woobie once. That's big.

More from Jamie

Here's another journal entry from our little diarist:

Daddy, Connor:
I'm going to go on the roof, in Cyprus. It's so exciting! But there's going to be a fence. Hmmm... oh man, I don't know how high it's gonna be. Eh. Uh, how high is it gonna be? I think I'm gonna fall.

Jamie and Gwen and Peter put sand in a bowl and then we put water in the bowl and then we took it out and it was mud and we were pretending there were sea monsters in the water and we threw mud at it. We saw a shark. For real. We really did. For real.

(they didn't).

Our correspondents abroad

Here's an entry from Sarah and Jamie from Cyprus!

Jamie is keeping a journal. He was really inspired by hearing about Anne Frank, whose house we saw in Amsterdam. He is exploring various forms of journaling; the first is in the form of a letter, the second is a reminiscence, the third is more of a diary entry:


Dear Liam, I liked going in the ocean and going in the waves. That was so fun. I loved it. I loved when we had sleepovers. Me and Liam were having so much fun playing the lion game when Liam was a rabbit and I was a lion and we were friends when we were a kid and a teenager, but when I grew up to be a grown-up I didn't remember the rabbit, but when he went into this hole I remembered him.

When we were in Vermont, I was in a room with bunk beds. I had a bicycle that Pops got for me. I went on a boat ride with Daddy. Connor had a birthday and I made a choo-choo train cake with Nonni. I went to school in Vermont and I had a friend named Cyrus. Me and Cyrus played and the teacher sprayed water at us and we ran away. Pops took me and Connor to a ski mountain in Connecticut. Pops told me that he and Emma went there and skiied. I thought I didn't want to ski.

Jamie: I saw more than 100 bicycles in Amsterdam and it was so cool in Amsterdam and I got to ride a boat with my momma. That was a lot of fun. And I rode a bus and two planes and two trains.

More from our little photographer

I've posted a bunch more of Jamie's photographs and you should be able to view them here:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=25018&id=1387150310&l=1f910d43f2

I've started classifying into a few categories. Right now I've got: Abstract, or nearly so, Connor, the House, Media Studies, Toys, Things Jamie Loves, and Hard to Define. See if you can guess which is which.

Actually looking through about 250 of his pictures from the last month, made for an interesting journey from old house to new seen from the perspective of about 4 feet off the ground. Really the categories represent his little world pretty effectively. Enjoy.

What time is it?

Jamie is very into time these days. This stems primarily from the fact that he knows he has to wait until 7:00 to get out of bed, but recently Jamie came home from school announcing that a friend had gotten a water-proof watch and he wanted one too. Something about the water-proof really set Jamie off. So we got him one and you see here his own picture of it. I'll try to get one of him modelling it. He is so cute wearing it because on the one hand (as it were), it makes him look very grown up to have a watch on. On the other seeing how enormous it looks strapped around his skinny little wrist helps us remember how small he still is.

Where is the table?

OK, everybody, moving and a little illness has kept from blogging but I'll get back on-line fully soon. A couple of quick notes, however. The boys are adapting very well to the new house. It had to be a bit strange because they went to school two Wednesdays ago from the old house and came home to the new one. This was helped considerably by having Pops around, which pleased the boys greatly. Jamie was initially displeased by the house and yard since none of his toys were unpacked yet (this is a kid version of those people on real estate shows who say they don't like a house because the furniture is ugly). But now that the toys are coming out of the boxes he is more receptive, though any time he bangs his head or foot on something unexpected he says "I don't want to live in this house." The first couple of weeks have been a little rough around the edges, though. We've had to turn the water off, lost the dryer and the fridge at various times, so even our most basic parental duties of feeding them and clothing them have only barely been met.

For his part, Connor has been non-plussed. Even when the boxes were piled high throughout the house, we had his ramp and cars set up. He marched in, didn't even look around and starting sending the cars down and was happy. He has been a bit confused about where things are in the house, however. Over the first few days he would periodically end up by himself in an empty room at one end of the house calling out, a bit anxiously "Mommy? Dada? Jamie?" Also, at one point after we washed hands, we told him to go to the dinner table. As often, he good-naturedly said OK and then marched off into the bedroom. We turned him around and he went into another bedroom. Finally he asked, not at all impatiently, "Where is the table?" It's a feeling we've all had in some form, frankly.

But we are meeting some kids on the street already and the boys are like riding their various vehicles around the block. There is also a pool and a playground literally around the corner and we have made much use of this already. The boys are sleeping in same room together as well. Jamie is usually so tired by the end of the day that he tells Connor to be quiet for us. They are taking a little too much advantage of being able to get out of bed and come into our room, but all in all its been a success. More soon...

Girls, girls, girls!

Jamie seems at once fascinated by girls and oblivious to/about them. On the one hand, there is his ongoing interest in Carson and her best friend Sophie. Also, the other day he told me in the car that his friend at school Callista calls him "Janie" as a nickname. He had a sort of silly smile as he reported this and then said, "She says it in such a cute way."

But then the other day we were at the Spring picnic at his school. We were all playing in the gym because it was rainy. We were all playing with boys when two girls from his class came up and dragged him away. Every time he would squirm away from them, they would track him down and drag him back to base in some sort of game of tag. Sarah and I were of course beside ourselves watching this. But the very next day we were talking about the picnic and what he had done and it was as though it hadn't happened. When we reminded him, he sort of said, "Oh yeah," in a vague way and went back to talking about sports and balls.

More big boy

Well, as we prepare to move, we are getting rid of some things. Since Connor is not such a baby any more, we decided to sell the crib and changing table and some other things. This all happened rather suddenly, so Connor came home from school on Wednesday to discover that his crib had been replaced by a toddler bed. We played the "big boy bed" angle relentlessly and it pretty much worked. He was excited at first and then seemed a little uncertain, but ultimately he climbed right in at bedtime, without a tear. He was awake a bit longer than usual, which is understandable, since it must have been a bit disorienting. But compared, of course, to our attempt to get Jamie into the toddler bed, which not only failed but set off a 2-month, knock-down, winner-take-all battle of wills over sleeping, this was a great success. Now we move to potty-training. Joy.

In other ways lately Connor seems preternaturally mature for his age. He is surprisingly able to give voice to his emotions, and those of others. Sometimes Sarah asks him to give her a hug and he declines. "Don't be sad," he says. "You're right," Sarah agrees, "You don't have to hug me." "No," says Connor, "I don't."

Part of the strangeness of hearing this comes from the fact that he has this sweet little voice that still sounds like a baby's. This is even more incongruous when he voices his displeasure with us. If he doesn't get what he wants, of course sometimes he cries. Other times, however, he just squints his eyes, furrows his brow and says, "You made me MAD!"

Big boy!

Connor is really not a baby anymore. He will tell you so. Today in the car as he was bombarding me with questions, many of which I couldn't quite understand, I tried the catch-all answer, "I don't know." Since I knew this would probably not satisfy him, and would perhaps even anger him, I tried to sugar-coat and said, sweetly, "I don't know sweet-pea." Well, this angered him for a different reason. "I'm NOT a [this slowly, uncertainly] sw-ee p-ea! I'm A BIG BOY!" I quickly agreed, but not quickly enough, so he brought out the big guns: "Mommy told me I'm a BIG BOY!!"

He is indeed policing us very carefully now for signs that we are treating him or addressing him as a baby. This makes me nervous because it means that our nicknames for him are suspicious. For instance, we like to call him "bunny." I don't know why exactly, but he just looks like a bunny. So lately he asks, "Is a bunny a big boy?" Yes, I assure him, with all the earnestness I can muster, a bunny is a big boy. This one is anyway.

Courtship

Things seem to be moving along well with Jamie and Carson (his intended fiancee). They have a chance to spend some time together during after school gynmastics on Tuesdays. Last week he reported that Carson had been making a mean face at him. This week he eagerly told me as soon as he got in the car that Carson had been "smack smack smack smacking me. And I liked it!" Sarah later asked him if he liked it because it meant Carson was paying attention to him and he enthusiastically responded "YES!!!" Ah, young love.

Random Connor stuff

No real theme to this post, other than the strange and funny world of Connor. As some of you may know, Connor's favorite activity is putting matchbox cars down a ramp. It's really more of a state of mind than an activity at this point. If he's not doing anything else, he just sort of defaults to putting cars down the ramp. Well, the other day we were getting onto the highway (many Houston stories begin this way) and Connor began demanding, as is his wont, that I go fast. Jamie, having often demanded the same explained, a little wearily, that I couldn't because we were on a ramp. Something clicked in Connor's brain and his eyes widened and he said, voice pregnant with excitement, "We-we-we-we-we-we-WEEE going down RAMP?" Livin' the dream, man. These are Houston boys, no doubt.

Connor is also coming to grips with numbers. He has basically two categories: More, which is signified by the number six, and less, which is referred to as one. Generally speaking six is better than one, as it might be mobilized to ask for, for instance, six gummy bears. Recently, Sarah was picking him up at school and he was outside playing having a good time. She told him it was time to leave in one minute. "No, no, no, no, I want..." Now his face began twisting with concentration as he starting trying to command the wee fingers on his hand to stand up in some kind of order. After some considerable effort 3 fingers popped up together and he said... "SIX!!!"

That'll show us

On Friday at about 5:30, as we were planning for a normal night of dinner/bath/books/bed, to conclude at the usual time, 7:30-8, a friend of Sarah's called with Astros tickets for that night. It was a beautiful cool, crisp Houston evening so on a whim we said sure let's go and we did indeed have a lovely time. Neither boy paid much attention to the game and there were two little girls there, with whom Jamie was very happy to spend his time, especially since they had popcorn.

Now, we knew that there were fireworks after the game, but were non-committal about it with Jamie. While he used to be terrified of the prospect of hearing fireworks, let alone seeing them, he was now pretty excited for it. The game went fast so we said OK. Both boys enjoyed them. Connor sat on Sarah's lap with his hands over his ears staring upward with his mouth opened in awe. Jamie sat on my lap and I covered his ears. He later admitted that he had been a little scared, but that he loved the fireworks. There were lots of questions about how they worked (like I know) and what their relationship to guns and bombs is.

By the time we got the home and to bed, it was probably 10 o'clock. Late, but we figured it was the weekend, they could sleep in. Yeah right. Well, Connor actually did sleep 'til 8:30 but Jamie was up at 7:15. And, what do you know, they were both cranky ALL weekend as a result. Neither slept in much on Sunday and they were both real pills. Then today, a school day they slept until almost 8 and would have happily kept going. Jamie proclaimed, "I just want to go back to sleep!" Like that would EVER happen on the weekend. Oh no.

Jamie turns 13

So, we are always interested to hear what's going on with Jamie and his plans to woo Carson. Yesterday, he went to the nurse because he wasn't feeling well (unspecified symptoms.) He hadn't eaten breakfast that morning, which, actually, is unusual these days. Jamie has discovered that he likes cereal and often has two bowls in the morning (!). But today he just ate the gummy vitamins we also give them. This meant that when the nurse very intelligently asked what he'd eaten for breakfast that day he could honestly answer: gummie bears. Way to make us look good Jame! Of all the things we did on the vacation to St. Simon's he also only told his peace-mongering, leftist teacher that we had been on a battleship to see guns. No mention of the sea-turtle rescue/education center we went to, oh no.

Anyway, as he was finishing dinner last night he informed us later that day that there was a little girl who was also in the nurse's office, who knew Carson. Eager for details, we tried to press a little and find out how this had come up. Jamie was evasive. So we asked the little girl's name. He took his last bite of dinner, put his fork down and said, "I'm outta here!" and left the table.

Law offices of Costello and Costello, pt. 2

We have already thought for some time that Jamie might make an excellent litigator one day. He never accepts an initial offer, he has a keen memory for precedent, and is creative about how to apply it. As I've spent a lot of time with the boys together over the past couple of weeks, I've come to think that, like lion cubs play fighting with each other to practice hunting skills, while the boys seem to be fighting they are actually practicing future court room behavior.

I say this in part because when I am with them, I feel very much like a judge, having constantly to decide between a variety of acceptable practices, followed by objections to be overruled or upheld. For example, just to give you a sense of the potential banality of much of it, today in the car on the way home, Connor pointed out a taxi cab, with great glee (he does this a lot). Jamie began silly talk, calling it a caxi tab. Connor voiced an objection to this, and proclaimed "Jamie CAN'T SAY THAT!" Jamie then objected to the objection and appealed to me. In this case I came down on the side of the defense, it seeming to me that there being no harm in Jamie's wordage, Connor couldn't reasonably seek a cease-and-desist order.

Seriously, they have been getting along really well at times. Connor was up first today and when Jamie got up, he cheerfully marched over and said "Hi Buddy!!!" to Connor and gave him a hug. They have been playing chase and Star Wars together a lot as well. It does seem that the more they play though the more they fight. This was exacerbated by being in the car for four days of course, which came with the requisite "Connor touched me!, Jamie touched me!!" (repeat 500X).

Watching the clock

Left to his own devices, Jamie would get up at first hint of light in the morning. So we have managed to institute a (mostly) successful system whereby both boys are meant to stay in bed until 7:00. Jamie is pretty good about this. He has a digital clock that he watches very carefully, waiting for the magic 7 to pop up. For his part, Connor seems to understand that he doesn't get up until Jamie does. Because he goes to sleep so much later than Jamie, even though they go to bed at the same time, he also not infrequently just snoozes right through until 7:30 or even 8 on the weekends.

This morning, for whatever reason, they were both up and chirping starting about 6. Sarah and I each went down once to quiet Connor. He was rarin' to go at 7 when I came down, but it was quiet in Jamie's room. I looked in and saw that he had fallen back asleep in his bed. As usual he had his woobie and his chosen stuffed animals nearby, but he also had the clock, which was sitting on the bed about 2 inches from his nose. He woke up when I made a little noise however and was quite gleeful to see: 7:04.

Our media savvy boy

While Jamie is no stranger to television shows, we have managed to keep him blessedly free from commercials. A few have slipped through on kids channels and the usual reaction of "I want that!", even when he doesn't quite know what "that", is has been produced.

But he has seen almost no adult tv at all of course. One day Sarah was upstairs getting ready to go out and had the tv on for a minute. Jamie came up in time to see a commercial for the Swiffer. He marched into the bathroom where Sarah was drying her hair and said with a kind of awe: "Mom, you HAVE to get this broom! They said it's the greatest floor cleaner in the world!" Sarah, gently said "Well, yes, honey they say that but..." Jamie insisted, however, "You HAVE to have it!" So Sarah took the opportunity to explain a bit about commercials and media and how they are trying to sell things to people and Jamie seemed to listen. He left the bathroom only to return moments later, predictably, with news of a set of knives that we really needed to buy.