Looking out for #2

Connor has to look out for himself, there is no question about it. He is very very quick to speak up if he feels that Jamie is getting anything that he is not. As noted in the previous post, he also likes to deliberately take the contrary position to Jamie, just to test out who is going to get his way. Poor thing, really, it must seem like he has to watch out for disadvantage at every turn. We had told Jamie as a part of a developing chores plan that if, among other things, he cleared his plate after every meal, he would get an allowance. Jamie took it a bit more literally. He brought his plate to the sink after breakfast yesterday and then demanded some money. We explained to him the way it would work and he was satisfied. Connor, however, was clearly listening, because he looked up and said "Is Jamie going to get ALL the money??" No, we said. Connor replied succinctly, "Good," and went back to his coloring.

What a boy wants

On Wednesdays this semester I pick the boys up at 3:15. Sarah isn't usually home until 5:30 or so, so I like to take the boys for an ice cream and some kind of activity. Last week after our frozen treat we went to Hermann Park. There is an outdoor theater there, with a big grassy hill where people can sit. Because we have two Houston boys, who have grown up looking at a completely flat landscape, this is fascinating. So we played on the hill. The boys like to run down the hill with me at the bottom, trying to run past without me catching them. I have to walk a fine line between seeming like I really am trying to catch them, but not actually doing so.

As is almost always the case just we have gotten somewhere, Jamie announced he needed the potty so off we went to take care of that. Public bathrooms with the two of them are always a bit of an adventure ("Connor! Don't touch ANYTHING!!"). Finally, we got some good hill running in. Jamie then declared he wanted to go to the dinosaur museum, across the street. Connor, sensing an opportunity, announced that he did not want to go, thus ensuring that I would displease one of them. In this case, I opted against going because it was getting late and the boys get very cranky if their blood sugar gets low. Apparently, however, this had already happened as Jamie had a meltdown. Even as I know I'm doing the right thing, of course, part of me always feels bad in not giving them what they want. But then later, having calmed down a bit, Jamie announced, in EXACTLY the same tone that he had said he wanted to go to the museum, that he wanted to go to Pluto and he wanted to go when he was still a kid. This reassures me, actually, by making it clear that no matter what there will always be something else he wants and he will never understand why he can't have it all.

Little brother moments

Poor Connor has been having a lot of them lately. This is the price of greater comprehension of the kinds of games that he Jamie are likely to play. Of course, everything is a race between them. For a while this was fine because Connor didn't really understanding what winning meant. Jamie would say "C'mon Connor let's race!" and dash off somewhere. He would of course arrive first and begin shouting "I win! Yea!" Connor would get there eventually and just blithly copy Jamie, since that's what he does. He was usually happy enough doing so not to notice Jamie's voice saying, "No Connor, you lost!"

But now, alas, it's all too clear. A little morning ritual lately has been the race from the backdoor to the car, which, of course Jamie wins. Connor, now understanding perfectly the nature of a race, gets 3/4 of the way and when Jamie announces "I won!" begins sobbing, absolutely sobbing saying "IIIII WAAAAAANTEEDD TO WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!" It helps a little if I tell him he beat me, but not much. Jamie meanwhile can be seen strapping himself into his car seat with an expression of great self-satisfaction on his face.

Like a candle

As noted, we tend to get very little information from the boys about school. Connor is actually even more reticent than Jamie, although we recently learned that he has two buddies at school named Claire and John. Claire, he tells us, sometimes whines, but John does not. Neither, he says, does Connor. In the car the recently with Sarah coming home from school they both busted out singing a song they must all be working on called "Light a candle." It is a very St. Catherine's song. Jamie can do it all the way through, but Connor just loops the first verse, changing "light" to "like". Without anything to stop him, he will go on singing "Like a candle for peace, like a candle for love, like a candle for the whole world," more or less indefinitely. Inevitably, when one sings the other wants to as well and they begin fighting so the sounds of "Light/like a candle for peace" are mixed with the increasingly angry protestations of first one child and then the other. It's quite moving.

Connor is actually quite the performer. Last night as we sat down to dinner, he suddenly announced, "I have to go sing in the hallway!" So he marched off to the other room, where we could hear him singing "Like a candle" to noone, and then came back in and sat down.

The Kielt clan in particular will also be curious to know that whenever he has pants and no shirt on he begins dancing around saying "Hot stuff! Hot stuff!" You see at one of the children's spectacular shows in Punta Cana Connor's group appeared on stage, shirtless, with red pants and were instructed to dance to the song "Hot Stuff!" Most did nothing and Connor stood there with his woobie and pacifier looking bewildered, leading to much hilarity. Guess he just needs to decide on his own time and place for Hot Stuff!

Why oh why?

This is, I'm afraid, a completely standard parental lament so I apologize in advance. But how is it that children know to sleep in only on the days when not only does it not do their parents any good, but actually makes things harder?

The boys have been running on empty a bit lately. Jamie managed to earn us a reproof recently from his teacher because he spent much of the day at school lolling about saying he was to tired to do anything, so of course we got the "get them to bed early" speech. Really this is just what we get for having two boys with opposite sleep habits in the same room. Jamie, left to his own devices, will fall asleep quite quickly (assuming a detailed list of conditions has been adequately met). Connor, on the other hand, views his first entry into bed as merely the first act in an elaborate drama, which may go on for hours, featuring various excursions around the house, reading books, playing with toys and generally a lot of noise. So on the one hand we've got him keeping Jamie up. On the other hand in the morning, Jamie is up by 6:30 watching the clock like a hawk for the magic hour, when he pronounces victoriously, "It's 7!!!" (the phrase has become synonymous in Connor's mind to "time to get up" so he says when he wakes up no matter what time it is) and the day begins. Connor, left to his own devices, would happily go on sleeping, but the prospect of being up with Jamie is too much to resist, so he usually gets up too. Hence they are tired all day.

Having done this all weekend, and all summer for that matter, this morning, Monday, ie. schoolday, of course, they sleep in. We have already been up showering and getting meals ready for them and they are snoozing away at 7:30. Sarah went in and rustled about, opening windows hoping to roust them but it produces no discernible effect, where usually the slightest noise from our side of the happway will produce eager inquiries into our state of wakefulness. How, how how do they know to do this? Finally, she woke Jamie up and he reanimated pretty quickly. Connor, however, tried to ignore her and stay in bed, rolling over and covering his face with his woobie. Occasionally, he does this, though more often at nap time. Once weekend, when a nap threatened to push 3 hours and throw nighttime schedules completely off, I went into his room and gently shook him, saying "Time for bunnies to wake up." He opened his eyes slightly, and mumbled "Time for bunny sleepies," and rolled back over. This morning, however, Sarah was persistent and so finally Connor bounced up and declared triumphantly, "It's 7!"

Connor still speaks French

Connor's abilities as a mimic are impressive. He copies absolutely everything that Jamie does, of course, because Jamie is the most interesting person in the world. But Connor does manage to find time to copy us. Since spelling is becoming a less effective means of masking what we are saying from Jamie, we have taken to speaking French to each other when we need to communicate something we don't want them to hear. Fortunately, this is generally pretty simple stuff, like should we let them have cookies. But I guess it becomes habit because we've been hearing a number of French phrases mirrored back to us by little Connor. He sometimes comes running into the room and presents himself with a "Woila!" And my favorite of all, when Jamie sends up the call from the bathroom, "I need a cleanup!", Connor will say, a little wearily, "J'arrive!".

Fall in Houston!

OK, not really. Living in Houston, we have come not to expect big seasonal changes. One doesn't get fall at all really, let alone anything like "indian summer." On the other hand, we have learned to be attentive to the slightest fluctuations in whether and lo and behold September 1st was noticeably not as god-awful hot as August has been. So Sarah very intelligently took the boys outside when they got home, it being the first day in months that it wasn't too hot to be out of doors and not in a pool.

They had a picnic and then started up an exciting game of freeze-tag, which quickly morphed in unpredictable ways. First of all Connor, even though he frequently says, tauntingly, "Come and get me!" and runs away, looking back over his shoulder to make sure you are following, doesn't liked to be chased. His laughs change almost imperceptibly into a high-pitched "Noooo!" He also has the habit when he is scared of putting one or both hands up to his mouth. It looks almost comically theatrical but is very geniunley felt. So, it was decided, in consultation with Jamie, that Connor had a special power that he couldn't be frozen. This reassured Connor considerably, but he then decided his special power meant that he could hold his hands out and zap Sarah with some kind of light energy, like the Emperor did to Luke Skywalker at the end of Return of the Jedi. So, while not chasing Connor, but not excluding him from the game, Sarah had to show that this power was affecting her. Further complicating things was the fact that Jamie of course now wanted to have a special power, which turned out to be to make Sarah move very slowly. So she had to chase two boys while being slowed by one and knocked down/electrocuted by other. Being a mom is a real balancing act sometimes!